Thursday, November 10, 2016

You Can't Do That

You Can't Do That

There are hundreds of upsets, missteps, booboos, and don't-dos that can kill any relationship.

This morning I had to remind myself of one of the most common mistakes that can turn sweet into sour.

Sometimes we think we're being oh-so-funny by sending a loved one a sarcastic message or text, without realising that what might seem funny to us is only funny at someone else's expense. There is funny and then there is making fun of ... very different situations.

Who knows why we make fun of other people? Psychobabblists will tell you it's because we want to feel superior to them, that "misery loves company," and blah, blah, blah. I'm not so sure any of that is true. Sometimes, we just seize the opportunity to engage in a little humorous repartee. So, we fire off a little zinger, without thinking what impact our "joke" might have on the other end of the zing, so to speak. It's important to remember that our zing is someone else's zang, and the two are not always a neat fit, like one of those nifty yin(g) and yang symbols.

For example, you might think it's funny to say something disparaging about someone's culture, traditions, or even where that person lives.

Uh-uh ... noooo ....

Say your partner is Mexican, well, you can't say something like, "Mexico doesn't win Olympic medals because all the best runners, jumpers, and swimmers are in America."

Well, you can say it, but don't expect the relationship to last much longer afterwards.

No, it's always important to be aware of when you're crossing the line, when you're entering the world of stereotyping and racism. People tend to be proud of their heritage, and if you disrespect that heritage, then you will probably be seen as offensive as your crude remark.




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