Wednesday, February 17, 2016

Pillow Talk


Pillow Talk

By definition, I suppose pillow talk should occur on a pillow. However, it is not intended to mean that you actually talk to the pillow. You talk to the person who is lying on the pillow beside you. If there is such a person, congratulations. That fact would suggest that you are in bed with someone. It would further suggest that there is a reason you are in bed with this someone. I hope that reason is obvious. If not, please don’t email me. Well, yes email me. What the hell . . . ???

I suppose there is good and bad pillow talk. I was fortunate enough to procure some bootleg tapes from the Pillow Talk Motel that is located just outside Hotchkiss , Colorado, an interesting town that I just recently visited. These examples will hopefully guide you to a better quality of pillow talk in the future.
Room 114
Some people have different agendas:
Him: When I look into your eyes, I see the sparkle of stars . . .
Her: When I look into your eyes, I see the glitter of diamonds . . .
Him: When I look at the stars in your eyes, I fall helplessly into your soul . . .
Her: When I look at the diamonds in your eyes, I see a lovely 14-karat setting . . .

Room 148
Some people are in a hurry:
Him: You ready?
Her: Yep.

Room 144
Some people have family issues:
Her: Ooooh, my baby, baby boy . . .
Him: Ooooh, my mommy, mommy, mommy . . .
Her: Kiss me, bad baby boy. . . there and there and there . . .
Him: Kiss me, mommy . . . just there . . . just there . . . no . . . back there . . .

Room 164
Some people bring their work to bed:
Him: The Dow is up a solid 40 points . . .
Her: Asian market funds are wide open for investment . . .
Him: I’m hard on liquid assets . . .
Her: God, you’re so bullish with your deposits . . .

Room 147
Some people forget to take their Viagra:
Him: You shoulda told me this morning . . .
Her: Well, take one now for Crissakes, and wake me up when it kicks in . . .

Room 142
Some go a little too big:
Him: Hmmmm . . .
Her: Hmmmmmmm . . .
Him: Hmmmmmmmmm . . .
Her: Owwweee, owwweee, owwwweeee . . .

Room 194
Some people leave the high school dance early:
Her: You need to speak with Jonny . . .
Him: I don’t think . . .
Her: He’s sexually harassing all the girls at school . . .
Him: I’m not sure what to say . . .
Her: Why won’t you take this more seriously . . .
Him: Jeez, he’s my best friend, Mrs Poitier . . .

Room 145
Some people are a little uncertain:
Him: Are you sure?
Her: Yes
Him: Very sure?
Her: Yes, you?
Him: Yes
Her: Really?
Him: Yes, you really?
Her: Yes
Him: I’m not sure you’re sure . . .

Room 101
Some people get it almost right:
Her: I love you so much . . .
Him: I love you too . . .
Her: I’ve been waiting for you all my life . . .
Him: I know. I hated the line up . . .
 








 








 
 


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