[For International Woman's Day]
Verbal Abuseit's not you
it’s not you, please understand
it’s not the way you get roaring drunk
and pass out on the couch in the blue light of the television
it’s not the way you come from the bathroom, adjust your crotch,
and say, “Howdy!” like an insane cowboy in front of my friends
it’s not your poker buddies, the cigar smoke, the money you lose,
or the way you say, “I’ll get the bitch to go for more beer”
it’s not the way you yell and scream and beat the kids,
and tell them that it’s all because i’ve made you mad
it’s not the farting or the burping at the dinner table
on the rare Sunday i invite over mom and dad
it’s not the missed birthdays, horrific Christmases, broken promises,
or the way you dismantle every hope, every dream, every success
it’s not you, it’s me
no, it’s you
but it’s you because of me
it’s not you, please understand
it’s not the way you get roaring drunk
and pass out on the couch in the blue light of the television
it’s not the way you come from the bathroom, adjust your crotch,
and say, “Howdy!” like an insane cowboy in front of my friends
it’s not your poker buddies, the cigar smoke, the money you lose,
or the way you say, “I’ll get the bitch to go for more beer”
it’s not the way you yell and scream and beat the kids,
and tell them that it’s all because i’ve made you mad
it’s not the farting or the burping at the dinner table
on the rare Sunday i invite over mom and dad
it’s not the missed birthdays, horrific Christmases, broken promises,
or the way you dismantle every hope, every dream, every success
it’s not you, it’s me
no, it’s you
but it’s you because of me
Years ago, I was asked to write a poem for a local women's group's publication. This poem was the result, and when it was published, it created a bit of a furor, both for good and for bad.
ReplyDeleteIt's difficult to have this kind of conversation with women. There are those who want to talk about being abused (verbally and physically), and there are those who never want to discuss it with anyone. The sad reality is that the abusers usually get to walk away leaving their victims an emotional and physical mess.
DeleteIsn't today International Women's Day?
Fortunately, things have changed ... a little. Women are becoming more and more educated about what they must demand from a relationship. Hopefully, in time, the abuse will end, not only as women become more educated, but in how we teach our young men to manage their anger, until, eventually, everyone learns to treat one another with the care and respect they deserve.
DeleteToo much of that kind of thing..
ReplyDeleteWhy do women rationalize bad things away..?
Yes, that's the underlying question.
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ReplyDeleteYou managed to create a rather potently descriptive message within those words ... very well done!!
I can well imagine the diverse reactions this would have created ...
Thanks, Miss Lynne ... yes, some people always have their own agendas ...
DeleteI hope you also have met nicer women that this kind! We do exist ;-)
ReplyDeleteI have always thought that strong, independent-minded women are the most beautiful ...
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